Some years ago, I was given an inflatable dinghy for my birthday, and I couldn't have been happier. At the time, we lived by the Vltava, which is the main river that runs through Czech Republic. As soon as the sun came out, it was boat time, and boy, what fun it was.

The river flows at a respectable rate, but the real fun started when the big boys got their toys out - complete with several engines - creating waves at least the same height as Fred, my blow-up vessel, which would have made light work of flipping it over, had I not deployed the cockney counter-balance - a method for stabilizing a small boat in a big wave by just standing up and riding it out (I'm aware that this is neither a novel mechanism, nor in any way related to cockneys, but I like the sound of it, so it stays).

At one point, a river patrol stopped to ask if we were ok, since we were so completely at the mercy of the wakes, but we decided to play it tough and waved them on. The river pulled the little boat half-way to the city center, through a swan attack zone and almost over one of the river's small waterfalls. Heroically, I turned the ship around and powered back up the river, full speed ahead (paddling really hard) to avoid the rapids, which reached almost two feet in height. It could have been a stand-up-and-wade-to-shore situation.

You hear about these life-and-death moments, but you never think they will happen to you.

It takes a solid plastic oar to handle Full Speed Ahead. A lesser material would never make it.